John Wicker.com

I want to talk about an issue near and dear to my heart today, and that issue is confidence in yourself.

I have self-confidence issues from way, way back. Traumatic childhood, tough time in school, blah blah blah. Everyone has a sad story to tell, and to be honest, there’s probably a little bit of a loner or an outcast inside of every person that has gotten up in front of someone to play rock and roll– on some level, this music appeals to the rebellious folk who want to lash out.

So whether you have big-time issues or you’re the most confident cat in the club, at some point in your journey things are going to get to you. Maybe you had a bad gig. Maybe you had an argument with your girlfriend or were sick. Maybe you’re struggling to make an impact, to get signed, to get paid, or even to get a gig. Everyone has those moments where we think “Why am I doing this? Why would anyone want to actually come see me play? Who am I to think I’m something special?”

My favorite one is the old standby of “I’m never going to be as good as [insert super talented person] so what’s the point?” Everyone has had that thought once or twice– hell, I have it once or twice a day. But guess what– Bruce Springsteen wasn’t as good as the Beatles back when he started playing. Stevie Ray Vaughn didn’t have the chops to compare to Hendrix when he picked up his first guitar, and I’ll bet he probably didn’t have them even after five years at it. But both of those guys, and all of the other big names in the pantheon of rock and roll, did the same thing: they stuck with it.

I get the down on myself feeling a lot, especially right after a gig. I’m a perfectionist to the core, and if things don’t go as well as I’d like them to it really gets to me. I’ve done gigs where every rehearsal was awesome but then when I got in front of a microphone I couldn’t hit the first note. I’ve done gigs where everyone says we did a great show and all I can think about is how I messed up the lyrics, or stepped on somebody’s solo, or how the one of the comments or jokes I made between songs fell flat. After my best performance ever, I was still driving home thinking about how I was a little flat at the beginning of the first song, and then fumbled a lyric in the fourth one.

When I first started playing guitar seriously, I was in high school. I had a friend in school who had a band, and I thought he was a phenomenally talented musician. They played in front of real audiences, they knew their material, and they were TIGHT. We graduated the same year, and one day at our graduation rehearsal, he told me something that I remember to this day: “Dude, you’ve been playing guitar for what, two years now? If you aren’t good after six months, or really good after a year, you never will be.” Kind words, indeed. I told him to shove it up his ass.

But that comment stuck with me. I kept thinking about it every so often when I practiced, and even more so when I messed up a riff or struggled with some technique. And eventually, I internalized it and gave up playing. So I listened to a punk-ass kid and that kept me from doing what I really love for about 15 years.

When things are getting you down, if you’re frustrated with your progress, if you discover you’re actually human and that you make mistakes, don’t give up. When someone tells you you’ll never make it, think about them while you practice and hold it in your heart the next time the crowd goes wild when you finish a song. Keep moving forward and always take the positives from every situation. It doesn’t matter if you have a setback– learn from it and keep at it. Ask anyone who is truly successful and they’ll tell you that 10% of their success is due to talent and the other 90% is all hard work. That means that even if you’re a talentless hack (and you aren’t), you can still be better than 90% of the people out there when you work at it.

Keep working it. Keep a positive attitude and remember that a mistake is really just an opportunity to learn. Believe in yourself even if no one else does, and when you make it, your success will be all the sweeter for it. Don’t let them get you down!

The open mic at Bearno’s on Sunday was a blast. The food was great, the crowd was awesome, and the music was incredible!

Things were supposed to get started around 7 PM but for a couple of reasons, things were a little late getting started. The first band up were The Cigarittes— these guys had the look down and were playing some awesome tunes… Van Halen, Poison, the Stones, the Doors. Incredible musicians, and they’re all so young! Totally not sure about the name, though.

Spare Parts were up next and we got set up really quickly, which was impressive to me, since we had a keyboard, two amps and two sets of guitar effects, and six people to get in place and ready to go.  I was really pleased with the sound and I could hear what everyone was playing pretty well from on the stage. The real trick, of course, is what it sounds like in the audience– you have to hope for the best, but you never really know. Luckily, Larry (who runs the open mic for Bearno’s) was giving me updates on where the sound was at, and I was able to tweak the sound levels at the mixing board as I sang.

We did six songs– “Some Kind of Wonderful”, “Gimme Three Steps”, “Cumbersome”, “Keep Your Hands to Yourself”, “Honky Tonk Women”, and “Pride and Joy”– and we all had a blast. We had to restart one song because of a technical issue, but we recovered from it gracefully. The crowd seemed to enjoy the music, and we enjoyed playing even more. The biggest deal to me, however, was the fact that we had gotten together to practice exactly one time before that performance. We had literally just met each other for the first time Friday afternoon, but we all knew our parts and it came together really well.

When we were done, a band called Duet Upright (sorry, can’t find a link) took the stage. They had a stripped down and intimate feel, and their harmonies were very tight. I heard them do the better part of “Halleluah” by Leonard Cohen and it was breathtaking, but I had to get the rest of my family home. The next time out, I hope I get to hear more of their performance.

Thanks to everyone who came out to see us, and to all of the new folks we met there!

My new band, Spare Parts, is playing tomorrow night at Bearnos by the Bridge (2nd and Main Street).

They call this “Sunday Night Band Practice”, and it lasts for half-an-hour per band. However, I haven’t played out since August– and since there are live people to play in front of,  and a stage to play upon, I’m thinking of it as gig!

So come down to Bearno’s tomorrow at 7 PM tomorrow night, and check out Spare Parts. Please? Thanks!